Blog Archive


Search This Blog

Tuesday, September 20, 2005

In the Real World...

Since I started commenting on the now defunct Spinsanity I have 'met' some interesting people online. Most of those that I have spent more than 2 comments corresponding with I have 'liked'. I place the word in inverted commas since it is very hard to really know if it is truly them that i am connversing with, or whether it is some careful construct. I try very hard to be me on-line, though perhaps a little less loud and abrasive than I am in real life. I trust that those that I correspond with do the same. Of course if I didn't my blogging friends who also happen to know me in real life would call me on it straight away.

Generally I get on well with people who I have conflicting views with on-line. It is a simple matter of showing respect and not being a pushy arse. But how well do we think we would get on in the real world? This is not a suggestion to meet up with those folks from Hubris/Cabal/Spinsanity/Living in the real World/etc., I am just wondering what you folks think about the prospect of meeting the people you are 'talking' to everyday. Would it be a positive experience or do you fear that it would damage/destroy your online experience? It's an interesting question, I think.

I know that some people ridicule the notion of posters and commentators wishing to meet up (e.g. JeffG at proteinwisdom in reference to the Eschacon, even after it was explained to him that it wasn't a round of sycophantic arse kissing) but I don't see why, unless it is some inherent fear of how that would affect the blogging/blog reading experience.

As I said this isn't an invite, just a question to find out your attitudes to how you separate your on-line life with your 'real' life. Though my wife and I do have spare rooms, so if any of you yanks happen to be in the north of England in the future stay the hell away from my house, otherwise I'll set the dogs on you!


David E. Patton said...

Hi I’m an American poet who is trying to find out if my poetry can stand up across cultural lines and you can help me with this buy visiting my poetry site and letting me know what you think. Please feel free to jump around the site and leave a comment anywhere with in the site. Also I have a chap book that just came out and you can have it for free from the good people at
Thank You
Thank You

Kav said...

why thank you for popping by, but somehow I think that by spamming other people's weblogs you are hardly drumming up positive interest in your own weblog.

Anonymous said...

Kav - I have always wanted to have something where everybody could meet up, but not in a Eschacon kind of way. For one, I think the vitriol of some arguments would be greatly muted, as it is easier to get worked up on a computer, and people tend to be more civil in person.

Personally, I think it would be a fabulous idea for everybody to get together, and I nominate you to coordinate it.


hubris said...

I think it depends on whether or not the people involved go online to create a different persona (especially if it's to overcome shyness); as you indicated, you try to be yourself.

I try to be myself too. Of course, I'm even cooler in real life; I try to tone it down to keep from being intimidating.

David said...

I draw no distiction between people I meet online and those I meet through other more traditional [if you like] means. For me, it's a natural extension to meeting someone in a pub or at a club or wherever -- they're likely to share an interest or two, and it's from that you build up the relationship. Perhaps I'm too trusting, but I generally assume everyone's being themselves, and if I get disappointed at a later stage, well, I'll just deal with it I suppose. Worked out pretty well so far! ;)

Kav said...

Since I first went online I made friends that I thought of as friends. Sometimes though, my cynical mind makes me wonder about others but I console myself with the thought that they would be bound to slip up sometime so I could spot them. Face value, so to speak, is clearly the best approach.

I have the utmosty faith that you guys are genuine. Except David, I think he may be faking ;-)

JD, I sometimes like to think it would be nice to meet up. I'll be honest though, could be tricky for me to attend. Bloody big ocean in the way. If ever any of you guys are coming to the UK let me know and we can at least arrange to meet up if your schedule permits.

I'll be the one in the corner carrying a copy of the Times and wearing a pink carnation. You'll know its me when I say "the water is somewhat chilly" then you should reply, " indeed and when mixed with teh sand it chafes!"

Shinobi said...

Meeting up would be cool....but if I met you... I'd have to kill you.

In order to keep my identity a secret of course. Not just because I might enjoy it.

Anonymous said...

Kav, I am going across the pond to meet my brothers on one of their R&R weeks from Iraq. We are going to meet in London sometime in February, the first of many stops.


Kav said...


Let me know closer to the time what your plans are. It may be possible I can raise a drink with you for a few hours depending on where you and I are...